


Confessions

by AnnaOnTheMoon



Series: While You Were Sleeping [2]
Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Angst, F/M, Wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2017-12-23
Packaged: 2019-02-19 05:46:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13117308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaOnTheMoon/pseuds/AnnaOnTheMoon
Summary: After the KesPrytt incident, Beverly and Jean-Luc's relationship is strained.  When Deanna asks them to come in for a joint counselling session, she wasn't expecting the bombshell they dropped on her...





	Confessions

**Author's Note:**

> Edited and expanded from the version posted on ffnet. This follows on a few months after While You Were Sleeping.

Deanna sat and looked at the couple sitting across from her.  She asked them to come in civilian clothes, so he was wearing a deep v-neck beige top with tight black trousers, and she was wearing an off the shoulder blue sweater with leggings.  They sat on opposite sides of the couch, but he had his arm across the back with his fingertips lightly touching he shoulder.  She was looking down, playing with a thread on her sweater. 

Deanna cleared her throat.  “I asked you to come in civilian clothing because today you are not Captain Picard and Doctor Crusher, you are a couple –“ Beverly snorted. Deanna continued. “You are a couple of regular people.”

Jean-Luc leaned forward, pressing his fingers together against his chin.  “Counsellor, why are we here?”

“It’s obvious that you two are still having some kind of falling out with each other over the incident –“ Another snort from Beverly. “on KesPrytt several months ago.  I want to help you two resolve this.”

“I see.” Jean-Luc  sat back again and once again reached his arm out towards Beverly.  Beverly adjusted herself slightly so Jean-Luc’s arm was resting across her shoulders.  “Deanna,” she began, looking up at her best friend, “How long have you and Will been in love?”

Deanna gave her a sharp look.  “I don’t see what this has to do with you and the Captain.”

“How.  Long. Have. You. And. Will. Been. In. Love.”

“I’m sorry, Beverly, but that’s really none of your business...”

“And my personal life is?” Beverly raised her voice at her best friend. “ Just answer me!”

“Beverly, I am the ship’s counsellor. The mental well-being of all the staff, including the Captain and Chief Medical Officer is my responsibility.”  Deanna looked over at Jean-Luc for help.   “Counsellor, I think it would be best if you answered Beverly’s question.” Deanna sighed.

“Fifteen years.” Beverly met Deanna’s eyes.  “And how many times in the past fifteen years have you and Will tried to make a go at it and have it not work out?”

“Dozens, I suppose. But I still don’t see what my relationship or lack thereof with Will has to do with you and the Captain.”

“ Jean-Luc and I have been in love for over twenty-five years.” Deanna gasped and looked at Jean-Luc for confirmation.

“It’s true.  I met the most beautiful cadet whilst I was assigned to the Academy back in...well, let’s say it was quite some time ago. She was half my age, but oh, I didn’t care.  She was perfect.” Beverly blushed as Jean-Luc continued,  “So you see, Deanna, our relationship is very much like yours and Commander Riker’s.  We have tried many times to have a relationship, but it doesn’t seem to work out.   At the time, our relationship was highly inappropriate.  I was her instructor.  I shouldn’t have, but I couldn’t leave her alone.  I took her virginity and I’m afraid I was a coward and told her we had to end it shortly after.”

Beverly spoke up. “And then I found out I was pregnant.”

Deanna gasped.  “What...what happened to the baby?”

“Oh, I didn’t abort. I couldn’t.   I just knew we weren’t in a position to raise a child...I still had seven years of academy training, medical school, and internships ahead and Jean-Luc was about to go back on the _Stargazer_.”

Deanna was puzzled.  This was something she had never gotten a sense about from either of them.  She knew that the Captain always treated Wesley like a son and would always get a wistful look when he looked at him, but Deanna had no idea that it was because he and Beverly had a child together.  “What did you do?”

“We went to France,” Jean-Luc reached for Beverly’s hand and clasped it in his as he continued the story.  “I would have married her and left Starfleet, resigned my commission...but Beverly wouldn’t let me. She said it was pointless to throw away my career over sleeping with a student.  I told her I didn’t care, I only cared for her...but you know Beverly and her stubborness.  She stayed in France and took a leave of absence from the Academy for 6 months.  My brother – Robert – and his wife had been struggling to conceive and so it seemed like the perfect solution.  They would raise Yvette as if she were their own.  For a long time, Yvette never suspected her parents weren’t Robert and Marie, but a few years ago she had an accident where they needed to find a genetic match...Beverly would know more about what happened.  But Yvette found out her parents were not a 100 percent match - Marie not at all, and Robert only a small percent.  Robert contacted me, and Beverly and I both agreed to Yvette being told we were her parents.   Beverly went to be a donor to save our daughter’s life.  After Yvette found out, she wanted to meet her brother, but at the time we decided Wesley wasn’t ready to learn he had a sister.”

“Don’t you mean half sister?”

“Er...no.” Deanna’s eyes widened and she said  “I think you had better continue.”

Beverly picked up the story. “Walker became my mentor.  He had no idea that Jean-Luc  and I had had an affair, let alone knew each other.  He wanted me to meet his best friends and told me his friend was perfect for me.  When Walker introduced Jean-Luc and Jack to me, we had no choice but to pretend we hadn’t known each other.  When Jack asked me out, I said yes.  I thought it would keep Jean-Luc and my secret safe. I panicked when Jack asked me to marry him.  I think I said yes because I thought that was what I was supposed to do.  I should have...I should have talked to you first, Jean-Luc.  Then maybe I wouldn’t have...” she trailed off.

“Wouldn’t have what?” Deanna pressed.

“I seduced Jean-Luc.  On the _Stargazer_.  In his ready room.  Jack and I...we had been married for several months but the sex was horrible and I knew I didn’t love him.  When I became pregnant again,  Jean-Luc agreed to allow Jack to think the baby was his...I was afraid Jack would have hurt Jean-Luc if he knew the truth...and then five years later, Jack died...but at least he died thinking Wesley was his son...” At this point, Beverly couldn’t  keep the tears from falling.  Jean-Luc gathered her in his arms and held her, murmuring soft words in French to her as he comforted her. 

Deanna was shocked.  How had she not picked up on any of this?  She knew there was some kind of history between them, and she practically could taste the sexual tension coming off of them, but a child?  And not only one...but two?  What else were they hiding ? Deanna was almost afraid to ask, but it was her duty as counsellor to get them to open up about everything. “Is there...more?”

“Rene.” Beverly said through hiccups.  “Rene is ours too.   Five years after Jack’s death, when I passed my Commander exam...Jean-Luc came to take me out to celebrate...” she trailed off.

“I see.  Any other surprise children?”

“Yes. Well, no.  I had two miscarriages.” Beverly buried her face in Jean-Luc’s chest and he continued to comfort her.  “Shhh...it’s alright, _mon Coeur._ You don’t need to talk about this anymore.”  Beverly sniffled. “No, I have to.”  She sat up. 

“The day of Jack’s funeral, Jean-Luc spent the night.  I became pregnant but I lost the baby after only ten weeks due to stress. No one knew about the baby except for us.  The second time was shortly after the ship launched...Do you remember the intoxicating virus?”  Deanna nodded. “Jean-Luc and I slept together while we were under the influence and I became pregnant. We were going to...well, we were going to finally try to be together for the sake of the baby as it was going to be hard to hide a pregnancy and a baby on the ship...but I had a miscarriage after fifteen weeks and after several months I decided to leave.  That’s why I took the posting with Starfleet Medical.”

“But you came back.”

“I...couldn’t stay away.  Wesley didn’t want to leave his father and I needed to be near him...and Jean-Luc.”

 “Wait. You said Wesley wanted to be with his father.  So Wesley...knows? Does he know everything?”

It was Jean-Luc’s turn.  “We told Wesley when we found out Beverly had become pregnant six years ago.  He took it surprisingly well.  He doesn’t know Rene is his brother.  He knows Yvette is his sister, but we felt it best if he just thinks Rene is his cousin for now as we didn’t think it was our place to tell Rene.  If Robert and Marie want Rene to know, they can tell him. You’ll find a small note in my logs six years ago noting an official name change for Wesley. After he found out Jack wasn’t his father and I was, he wanted to use my name.  Officially, he is now Wesley Picard.  He is still using Crusher at the academy to avoid special treatment because Yvette had a hard time, and she was only thought to be my niece. ”

Deanna was reeling with the information she had just found out.  “Let me get this straight.  You,” she pointed at Jean-Luc, “and you,” this time she pointed at Beverly, “have been in love with each other for more than twenty-five years and have conceived five children together and yet you are still not willing to be together?  I’m sorry, but I don’t understand. I sense a lot of love between the two of you.  Clearly, you two mean a lot to each other and are in fact, each other’s great love.  Captain, I believe you and Beverly are soul mates.”

Jean-Luc looked down at his hands.  “She said no.”

“I’m sorry, Sir, I didn’t hear what you said.”

“She said no.  I asked Beverly to marry me several times and she always said no.”  Jean-Luc reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box, laying it on the table.  “I have had this ring for twenty-eight years.  She refuses to wear it.”

“You carry it around with you?”

“No, I just decided to bring it to our session with you.”

“I see. Beverly, how does this make you feel?” Beverly looked down at her hands. 

“I didn’t want you to marry me just because I was pregnant...”

“Beverly!  You know that’s not true.  I’ve asked you to marry me several times before we knew you were pregnant...” 

Beverly sighed and reached for Jean-Luc’s hands.  Clasping his in hers, she looked into his eyes. “Jean-Luc, you know I love you more than words can say.  But I’m afraid that if we get married, you will leave me, just like our two unborn babies.  And I didn’t want it to cause problems with Starfleet... Jean-Luc, you are the Captain of the flagship, and I’m just your Chief Medical Officer—“

“Oh Beverly, you are much, much more than just my Chief Medical Officer.  You are my light.  My life.  My love.  The mother of my three gorgeous children and two we never met.  There aren’t enough days left in the universe for me to express to you how much I love you.  Please, wear my ring.  Marry me.  Stuff Starfleet.  I love you, Beverly Howard Crusher. Always have, always will.”  He captured her lips in a kiss and slowly placed the ring on her finger. “Beverly. Will you do me the honour of marrying me?”

Deanna, tears in her eyes, slowly backed out of her office to allow the two to have a moment alone.

Beverly looked down at the ring, sparkling in the light.  Should she?  “Yes, Yes. Of course. Can we do it now? Can the captain perform his own marriage?”  Jean-Luc grinned.  “Before you lose your nerve?” 

“Something like that.”

“I don’t think I can, but my First Officer should be able to...should I ask him to join us?”  Beverly nodded.

“Picard to Bridge.”

“ _Riker here.”_

“Ah, Number One. Could you please join me in Counsellor Troi’s office?”

_“Sir, is Deanna ok?”_

“She’s fine.  I just need you to join me.”

_“Right away, Sir.  Riker out.”_

Jean-Luc smiled at Beverly and called out to Deanna’s reception area.  “Counsellor, I think you should come back in now.” 

“Is something wrong?”

“No, everything is right.  We’ll be joined by Commander Riker in a minute and then...there just might be a wedding in your office.”  Jean-Luc’s eyes twinkled.  Deanna looked over at Beverly.  “Really?”  Beverly nodded.  “In my office? Don’t you want....a more romantic setting?”

Beverly thought about it for a minute.  “Jean-Luc, can we go to the holodeck?” 

“Whatever you want, my love.” 

“Twenty minutes?  And change into your dress uniform?”  Jean-Luc groaned but placed a kiss on Beverly’s lips.  “Anything for you.  Counsellor, please inform Commander Riker to meet me in the holodeck in twenty minutes in his dress uniform instead.” 

“Uhm...I kind of need Deanna’s assistance.” 

“Right.  Picard to Riker.”

_“Sir, I’m on my way...”_

“Belay that. Make it the holodeck in twenty minutes...and wear your dress uniform.”

“ _Sir?”_

“I’ll explain when we get there.  Twenty minutes.  Picard out.”  Jean-Luc pressed another kiss to Beverly’s lips. “Twenty minutes, my love.”

“Twenty minutes.”

###

Jean-Luc entered the holodeck and smiled at the scene in front of him.  They were on a hill in France, overlooking the family vineyard.  It had always been a favourite place of Beverly’s whenever they were in France, and it was the place Jean-Luc had first proposed to her twenty-five years ago.  Will appeared at his side. 

“Sir?”

“Ah, Number One.  Good, you’re here. Now, how familiar are you with wedding ceremonies?”

“Not very, Sir.”

“Well, you had better brush up. You’re performing a wedding.  I am temporarily appointing you as Captain of the _Enterprise_.”

“Sir, I don’t understand. Why can’t you perform the wedding?”

“Well you see, Number One...I’m the one getting married.”  Will gaped at his Captain.

“Sir?” The doors slid open before he could ask anything else and Beverly glided into the room with Deanna trailing behind. 

“Ah, here’s my bride now,”  He walked up to Beverly and kissed her cheek. “You look beautiful, my love.”  Beverly blushed.  With Deanna’s help, Beverly had created a soft green dress that cascaded down her body in waves ending with a tiny trailing train.  She didn’t wear a veil, but she had a crown of flowers woven into her hair. Jean-Luc thought she was beautiful and he told her as much.  The door opened again, and Data, Geordi, and Worf filed in, all in dress uniform along with Guinan, who had a large grin on her face.  Jean-Luc raised his eyebrows at Beverly.

“Thought we could use some witnesses.  I only wish Wesley, Yvette, and Rene were here.” 

“We’ll call them later.”  Jean-Luc took her hand an turned to Will. 

Will cleared his throat.  “We are gathered here...”  Jean-Luc groaned.  “Shorter ceremony, Number One.  None of that nonsense.”

“Er?”  Deanna appeared at his elbow and started whispering in his ear.  “Ah, I see. Right,” He looked at the couple in front of him.  “Do you,  Captain Jean-Luc Picard  take Doctor Beverly Howard Crusher to be your wife until death parts you?”

“I do,” He slid a small ring onto Beverly’s finger. 

“Beverly, do you take Captain Jean-Luc Picard to be your husband until death parts you?”

“Try and stop me.”  She took the ring Deanna offered her and slid it onto Jean-Luc’s finger. 

“By the powers granted to me by the United Federation of Planets and Starfleet, I pronounce you husband and wife.  You may....carry on kissing,” Will wryly added as Jean-Luc and Beverly were already locked in an embrace. 

“Number One, you are in charge for the next week.  Doctor,” he paused, not sure if Beverly wanted to change her name. She nodded.  “Doctor Picard and I will be on our honeymoon in our quarters and are not to be disturbed unless one of our children needs us.”

“Of course, Sir.”  Jean-Luc’s words suddenly registered. “Wait, children? Did you say children?”

“I said children.  Speaking of, I believe we have some children to notify of our nuptials....”  He took Beverly by the hand and led her out of the holodeck.  “Thank you everyone for coming.  We really appreciate you being here.”  As the couple disappeared into the corridor, Will still held a look of confusion on his face.

“He said children. Why did he say children?”  Deanna patted Will’s arm.  “I’ll explain later...”


End file.
